Wanna know the title? Then read the blog!

 So Yh! This actually came to my mind while I was lying on my couch and ovethinking things as usual. I don't know if you're an overthinker,cause people like me read meaning to every single thing and then we bombard our poor brains with unnecessary stuffs (crazy right?) .

The past. Our past. Your past. Everyone here has a past whether good or bad but most times it's always both. We all have times when things were so good for us , true happiness people call it, times we didn't want to end but they did and we moved on (annoying, I know). Then we also have times when things were bad, definitely our nightmares, things we wish to erase and forget.. But we can't cause our brains are tad bit crazy, they tend to feed on the horrifying ones, playing it over and over in our heads (read this last line in Spongebob's voice). 

        Okay! I'm beginning to sound like a drunk person uhn? Honestly, have you ever wished to go back in time to change somethings? Do you regret your past life? Is your past affecting your present reducing your self esteem? Do you hate yourself because of what you've been through? If you do then hon, I'm here to tell you this nicely LET IT GO !(imagine me in a soldier's uniform with shades on screaming this at you)

     Even if you get a drug that takes you way back to change your past,  I don't think it will really help. Before we dive deep into this topic, remember that you're human and I'm not saying you should use this as an excuse for your bad deeds but I'm just saying that we're bound to make mistakes so don't beat yourself up over it. 

     Our past shouldn't define our future but it should help in making better decisions. Don't let your past judge you, you've done wrong yes I know! And you can make up for it if you have the chance to but if you don't, try to avoid those things you did back then, be a better you. Let your mistakes be a drive and not a setback and this also applies to relationships. 

      Most times people say girls are scam, boys are scam and love na scam but are these lines really true? Hell No! 

There are some rules in life you should know and live by, that way you don't expect too much from people cause expectation kills. 

#1: IT'S NOT EVERYTHING YOU LIKE THAT'S GOOD FOR YOU- I really really love ice-cream but I'm very prone to cold such that when I take a sachet of cold water, I have a serious and terrible cold (imagine the worst cold you've ever had, now multiply it by two... Yup! It's that bad) and If I go on taking cold/ iced stuffs , it can lead to pneumonia so I have to stay away from ICE-CREAM. (sorry I'm using food as an illustration... I'm a lover of food).

So because you like a guy/girl doesn't mean that person is the perfect one for you and that's why we have 2weeks relationships. 

#2: IT'S NOT EVERYTHING YOU LIKE THAT YOU GET- Growing up as a child, I've been deceived a lot and it still Hurts though. I've always wanted a toy car, the kind that you can sit in and drive all around with horns and other cool stuffs and my mum kept on promising me till I outgrew my desire for it( sad, I know). 

So you see, I desperately wanted that car and I worked really hard to get it but I didn't and that didn't kill me or did it? (rhetorical question right there). In other words, when you like someone it's not compulsory you get that person. This is where you find some people trying to sabotage others relationships just to have their way (O wrong now!). Beware of "I'm your girlfriend /boyfriend's best friend " kind of people. Honestly I don't advice opposite sex best friend relationship because if one ends up getting a partner, the other one won't know how to keep away (while some do it intentionally) and they'll be acting like parasites. As for me though, I'm not saying I don't have guy best friends but I always steer clear once they're taken (I don't want to be the witch Biko) .

#3 - IT'S NOT EVERYTHING YOU GET YOU KEEP - just because you finely landed yourself a cute guy who claims to "love" you now want it to last "forever". Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying relationships don't  last all I'm tryna say is that don't get that notion drilled into your head that any guy you meet you try to turn to husband material. You should learn to accept the fact that some things are bound to happen so don't stress over it. Learn to live in the Now, accept it as it comes. Enjoy whatever relationship you're into, give your best and let nature take course. (I'm a big fan of dolls, I had a box filled with em but I couldn't keep them forever, I had to let them all go. R.I.P my babies) 

#4 - IT'S NOT EVERYTHING YOU KEEP THAT LASTS FOREVER - this part is quite confusing. This is the part where trusts are broken, hearts are shattered and people are slapped into reality (oya Hit me! ). People betray, it's bound to happen cause not everyone is gonna stay. This is where things like "cheating" occurs and people are left to think that love is scam. Also, this has a part of toxic relationships. If a guy loves you and you guys finally get to be together and he ends up being different from what you met at first, he starts to maltreat you, he abuses you... All sort of nonsense. With all the shii this guy is doing, some girls will still want to stay - some because they're scared that no one will love them like the guy they're dating, some because of the stress of finding another guy, some are scared to leave, some because of the money they're getting (I'm not judging here tho) and some are just plain dufus.

      When people are going through things like this, the only notion in their head is that they don't want to lose the guy they've worked for, they don't want to suffer heartbreak because the guy is their oxygen and all those excuses. But my dear, heartbreak won't kill you but that man will. LEAVE HIM! if he doesn't treat you right let him go and when you finally do, don't be scared of loving another guy. 

Like I said earlier, your past shouldn't define your future but help in making better decisions. 

Don't let your past relationships judge how you see people, don't push people away because of what you've been through cause most times, you end up pushing the good guys away too. I understand that the wound your past left will be hard to heal and that's why you have to accept your past, open your heart to opportunities ,Go out, meet new people, have fun, do things that makes you happy, tick your bucket lists and most importantly practice self love. 

Do you know where true happiness is? It's within you. Your happiness is not with your crush or the guy you're dating. It's within you, you just have to nurture it. 

Create time for yourself, pamper yourself, find what makes you happy... Be confident in yourself. Know that it's the way you treat yourself that people will treat you. So, if you love yourself, people will love you too.

Also, when you meet new people, let your past help you in choosing better people, accept the ones that want to stay and give them a chance and if it doesn't work out again, move on and meet new people "again"... Never stop loving and also being happy. Life is a risk, if you don't take the risk then you won't enjoy life. Keep trusting people (don't be too careless tho) and if they break your trust, trust others. 

That's life, it's a cycle that never ends and maybe along the way, you'll find that amazing partner. 

Remember

, SELF LOVE is key. 

♡Annie~bee